Home » FWG Members: Writers » Mark “Prof Hauke” N.

Mark “Prof Hauke” N.

I read a lot of little autobiographical author blurbs and thought, “Gosh, some of them are so playful and funny! I want to do that!” So I tried for a while, and everything fell flat. No anecdotes or colorful histories would make my motivations for writing anthropomorphic fiction come alive.

I complained in frustration about this to my mate of several years, who said, “That’s because you’re not playful and funny — you’re bitter and cranky, and suck the fun out of everything. Remember the soccer ball incident?”*

“Yes,” I said meekly. Of course, I’m sure he exaggerated a little bit, but it’s essentially true! And so by being true to myself, I’ve been able to get this little introduction to pour forth.

So, I’m a math teacher (hence the “Prof”) and hopeful textbook writer. I’d like to pour out misery in the form of homework to many, many students. Writing furry fiction is a hobby or sideline for me, or a release valve from day-to-day life.

I only barely meet the criteria to be a member here; it’s because I started writing before there was a FurAffinity or a Yiffstar… and while I do have some stories that would seem right at home on a site with “Yiff” in the title, I had other works that I wanted to put into circulation. So, several have shown up in con books:  Anthrocon, Further Confusion, and a little piece in a booklet for Oklacon.

More stories are in the works.  As I said, sometimes writing is a release valve, so a lot of stuff ends up being “autobiographictional” (to borrow a phrase from Lynda Barry), featuring my chex-mix loving, math teaching basilisk. But first I want to perfect my logarithmic scale for comparing just how furry certain furries are.

 
*Soccer balls have exactly twelve pentagonal faces. So do “buckyballs”, golf balls, and any other convex polyhedron composed of only hexagonal and pentagonal faces; there must be exactly twelve, no more, no less. Well, I certainly thought it was interesting…

 

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